September 17, 2024|י"ד אלול ה' אלפים תשפ"ד Assassination Attempts and Bucket Lists
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“0 – 2.”
That was the defiant tweet former President Trump posted shortly after an assassination attempt on his life earlier this week, the second in less than three months.
The first time, Trump came within inches of losing his life and while the second time the would-be assassin didn’t get off a shot, Trump couldn’t help but feel he escaped death yet again. Reflecting on the incident, one of his sons said, “My father is running out of lives.”
The truth is one doesn’t need to be a former president, a current candidate, or a target of assassins to be concerned with mortality. Many people experience the mortality alarm in mid-life, triggered by the loss of a parent, a diagnosis, a near-death experience or just general “FOGO,” fear of growing old. As we age (and for some even in our youth) when we think about the dangers of this world, the uncertainty of life, the risk of illness, natural disasters, terrorist attacks and more, one can’t help but spend their life thinking about their eventual death.
While confronting mortality and contemplating the fragility of life can be debilitating and anxiety-producing, it can also be enormously motivating and inspiring.
The Gemara (Berachos 5a) teaches:
אָמַר רַבִּי שִׁמְעוֹן בֶּן לָקִישׁ: לְעוֹלָם יַרְגִּיז אָדָם יֵצֶר טוֹב עַל יֵצֶר הָרַע, שֶׁנֶּאֱמַר: ״רִגְזוּ וְאַל תֶּחֱטָאוּ״ אִם נִצְּחוֹ — מוּטָב, וְאִם לָאו — יַעֲסוֹק בַּתּוֹרָה, שֶׁנֶּאֱמַר: ״אִמְרוּ בִלְבַבְכֶם״. אִם נִצְּחוֹ — מוּטָב, וְאִם לָאו — יִקְרָא קְרִיאַת שְׁמַע, שֶׁנֶּאֱמַר: ״עַל מִשְׁכַּבְכֶם״. אִם נִצְּחוֹ — מוּטָב, וְאִם לָאו — יִזְכּוֹר לוֹ יוֹם הַמִּיתָה, שֶׁנֶּאֱמַר: ״וְדֹמּוּ סֶלָה״.
Rabbi Shimon ben Lakish said: One should always incite his good inclination against his evil inclination…If one succeeds and subdues his evil inclination, excellent, but if he does not succeed in subduing it, he should study Torah…
If he subdues his evil inclination, excellent; if not, he should recite Shema…
If he subdues his evil inclination, excellent; if not, he should remind himself of the day of death.
As human beings with an animal soul, we are drawn to the material, physical world around us. We struggle with desires, drives and appetites that relentlessly tempt us. Our rabbis teach when we feel we are in the throes and the grip of our alter ego, our animal impulse and instinct, we should follow a formula. First, try to show discipline, employ your positive inclination. If that isn’t successful, engage in Torah study to ground you and calm you. If that doesn’t work, say Shema, contemplate before Whom we must give an accounting. If we are still tempted, struggling and on the verge of indulging, the last resort is to contemplate the day of death.
(The Vilna Gaon says that the Rebbe Shimon Ben Lakish’s advice is alluded to in the verse rabos machshavos b’lev ish, v’atzas Hashem hi sakum. The Gra notes that “sakum” is the acronym for Torah, kerias shema and misa.)
Death is a motivating factor. Thinking about our mortality, considering the finality of death, serve to remind us to live and live life to its fullest. Perhaps that is why Yom Kippur, the holiest day of the year, is in some ways a dress rehearsal for our deaths. From Kapparos, the death of a chicken to atone for our mistakes, to the wearing of the kittel, the white garment that we will literally be buried in, to the Torah reading of Acharei Mos, “after the death” of the two sons of Aharon, the day is replete with references to death. We read of the asara harguei malchus, the ten holy martyrs murdered by the romans. We recite Viduy, the confession that is also said by someone on their deathbed. We abstain from eating, drinking and physical comforts and pleasures as if we are already only a soul devoid of a body. The Talmud says that Yom Ha’Hakippurim atzmo m'caper, u'misah m’chaperes, Yom Kippur and death atone for our mistakes.
Yom Kippur, like every encounter with death, urges us into the fullness of living. It should not be the most depressing day of the year, but rather can be our happiest if we use it to inspire our best year, a year in which we cross things off our bucket list. A bucket list is a list of goals and objectives to accomplish before we kick the proverbial bucket and it is too late. There are many books, websites and apps that encourage and promote people to create their own lists of what we want to do before we die.
There are classic lists, adventure lists, food lists, indulgent lists, and everyday lists like make someone smile, dance in the rain. Some want to skydive and others make a handmade quilt. Some want to travel to exotic locations and others taste unusual foods.
Our lists reveal a great deal about us. Confronting mortality means considering the question, what is on your list? What do you want to achieve or experience before it is too late? Does your list include making a million dollars, or making a difference? Does it include finishing a TV series or finishing Shas? Does it include spending time on vacations and trips or spending time with spouses and children?
Once you identify what is on your list, ask yourself, why haven’t you done it yet, what is holding you back or what is in your way?
You don’t need to be shot at to think about mortality. Considering death should inspire our best life. Write your bucket list and more importantly, start checking things off.